Little ditty

Let me tell you a story….it’s about a song, a song which I think may have changed my life. That’s a very powerful statement and of course I have no proof or indeed any way of obtaining any proof unless someone wants to clone me, erase the memory of the aforementioned song from my head then create another identical universe as well as a time machine to drop the clone back off to September 2009 and see if the clones life turns out differently to mine. No? Well ssshhh then.

I may have mentioned it before, in fact yes I have in my blog about End of the Road Festival 2009.
Ebby and I went to watch a band called The Low Anthem at EotR 2009. I had heard of them before but I can’t say I knew any of their tunes. We stood there in the bright warm sunshine, incidentley the only really nice weather we had had all that Summer and this was the second weekend in September so it really did feel sort of special. Just to go immediately go off on a tangent, (you’d expect nothing else) I haven’t mentioned it before but my memories of that year and the early part of 2010 are quite hazy. I was just sort of ‘acting’ at life. Doing what I thought I should be doing and occasionally getting drunk and talking about death with some very understanding friends. Anyway, I digress, (as always).. I will forever remember the moment I first heard the Low Anthem live. This hideously melancholic beat started to sound and the lead singer sang a song in an incredibly low whispering voice which to me felt like everyone else had just disappeared and he was singing to me..about me and the ridiculously dark person I was at the point in my life. What little emotion I showed outwardly came bubbling to the surface and I started to silently cry which I have certainly never done at a gig before. As the song finished Ebby hugged me and whispered to me that the song was written for me.
The unknowining tumour is fixing its home in the damp bed of the catacomb
As the raging war on the high wire unfolds she buries her teeth in the flesh.

After an incredibly emotional set that also had Ebby in tears I think we may have wandered off and found some booze. I think I can pinpoint this moment in time as when I first began to see the world through less grief stricken eyes, it really is amazing what a song can do.

When I came home from EotR 2009 I tried to find the song… I could only remember the above lyric. I searched on the net and found it hadn’t even been recorded let alone released yet. I found a version on youtube Here (apolgies for the awful sound quality) eventually that I used to listen to when I needed the hit of emotion, not always melancholic as the song eventually made me smile.

I went to End of the Road 2010 and it just so happened that the Low Anthem played again. Ebby and I got near the front and the band start to tell a little story about the song they were about to sing. They were sat in their tour bus at End of the Road 2009 waiting to come on and do their set when they penned a song that they were quite pleased with so sang it straight away when they got on stage whilst it was still fresh in their memories. It was obviously Smart Flesh which was the song that moved me…they sang it for me again but it had evolved. No longer so stupidly dark and melancholy, it had moved with me to a lighter brighter tune, still fraught with emotion but bearable and after it finished I had a huge grin on my face.

It’s just been released on their new Album which has been named after my song ‘Smart Flesh’. Listen to may not move you and you may find it dull like Bob does but that little song….my song will stay with me forever as reminder of who I was for about 18 months of my life, a shell of a person who wouldn’t have survived without good friends and an unbelievable husband. To quote another band “together we’re invincible”


2 Responses to “Little ditty”

  1. I’ve just read this for the first time and bawled my eyes out. Moments like that……. there are not words to describe.

  2. bimbo78 Says:

    And your comment had prompted me to read it again and to listen to Smart Flesh. Love you sweetie. Xx

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